Tune in as we catch up with some of our past guests to hear about what's happening in their love lives. We chat with Shelby who we set up on a blind date in Season 7, Chris who met his girlfriend in an Uber in Season 6, Farah who got breadcrumbed in Season 5, and past co-host Michael Vargas!
BONUS Check in with Past Guests Part 1
00:00:00 - 00:05:06
The Dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating that the Huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex. On each episode, we'll talk to real daters about. From sex parties to sex droughts, date fails a diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves. I'm your host Yue Xu, former dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer Julie Krafchick as we explored this crazy dateable world.
The dateable podcast features real stories from real people of how they make modern dating work or not your host you a former dating coach turned dating Insider boss will on each episode. You'll hear commentary from my producer Julie kraftchick and other surprised co-hosts. This episode of datable is brought to you by 500 brunches 500 brunches connect like-minded people with similar interests to meet in real life over brunch. You answer a quick question are about your interest and how you spend your time and then they'll match you in small groups of six to eight at a brunch spot in San Francisco get a free entry in 2 a brunch Now by signing up at five hundred branches and using the code date able. Hey everyone, welcome to another episode of datable a show all about modern dating. Yay. It's the end of the year the perfect time to catch up with some of your favorite past guest song. What if they've been up to are they still out there dating or have they met someone have they changed their mind set since being on the show? Well be prepared to be surprised amused and delighted by our recent catch-up session. Let's start with Shelby. If you remember for the opener of season seven we sent she'll be on to blind dates. In fact, the episode is called to blind dates. She met Nat and Beau Jo's to really hit it off with map whom she saw twice before he left on a trip. So what happened when he got back in town, let's find out shall be hi. Hello. I am dying to know what happened the last time we spoke you had just finished to blind dates one with Matt one with bow and you react Hit it off with Matt that night ended up in a nice makeout sesh you guys crashed a party and things didn't go as well with both. So obviously of the two you've had your favorite and then that went away right he went on a trip and I remember we were all strategizing about ways to keep in touch because we know how it goes when one person leaves town. Okay. What happened? Yeah. I I think when we were on the show, we discussed me reaching out, you know, just checking in while he was gone off I did so I think it was a few days after he had been gone. I just wrote him a message something about what we had been talking about and then I just said hope you're having a good trip and work is going well. And I think he just texted back like thanks for letting me know other thing that we were talking about and then he just said, yeah, it's been great working a lot. So I woke. Kind of like a really short reply and that was it. I was thinking of him again never heard from him again. Never saw him again. And yes pretty real. I call it a typical SS dating scenario. Oh bummer. Did you try reaching out to him again? Like I kind of felt like I I put myself out there when I was gone and I reached out and kind of a short text and I understand that he was working and things like that. But I mean honestly if he wanted to see me when he got back he would have reached out. So right right. Yeah, if you did see him now or ran into him on the street, which could very well happen. Would you confront him or ask him? Oh, yeah. I totally would what would you ask him? What would you say to her? I would obviously just I mean, I feel like I'm a pretty open person. I would just say hi and talk to him and see how he was doing and just kind of be like, hey whatever happened like birth. Heard from you. So I mean and I I mean he was a nice guy we got along well, so I mean I don't hold it against him. But I mean we went on 1 and 1/2 dates. I feel like we didn't really have any like obligation but it would have been nice to just have a quick like, hey just don't see this going anywhere text but right. Yeah people don't do that. They just let you know I paid the exact same thing happen to me to exact same thing and it's just like like right before the trip. It's like so exciting because you guys just are dating but you kind of think well this has potentially could go somewhere and everybody says the right things then you know, like oh, I can't wait to see you again. Once you're back and then you just never know what happened answer on that trip, but honestly, it's interesting cuz I will tell you I do have a boyfriend now what yes, oh interesting enough when I met him I got him at home. Party, and he got my number but he was like I'm going out of town for like a week or so. Hopefully I can text you when I get back and we can hang out and I was sure and on Iraq when that happened. I was like I've never going to hear from this guy, right and he reached out to me but it was right before I was looking for burning man.
00:05:06 - 00:10:05
I was like, hey, I'm leaving, you know about two weeks. So I'll let you know when I'm back and so it was kind of interesting cuz then I I did reach out when I got back and started off relatively slow. And then yeah now we're together. So, oh my gosh, how long ago did you meet him a couple of weeks before Burning Man so maybe like 3 ish months ago and you guys have been dating for how long I guess since that time and we've been official fir maybe like a month now and how did it become official She Gotta just called me his girlfriend and I was like, oh, I guess I'm okay with that. He was like, okay. How did he call you? His girlfriend was it when introducing you there was actually like weird just talking about the weekend. He was like this has been a great weekend. I just like bought a new surfboard wage what do and he's like and have a new girlfriend and I was like, oh, okay, but it was just it was just so easy. Like it wasn't it wasn't pressured. It wasn't like we needed to like sit down and have the chat. I need to know where we were cuz I think we already both felt like we were there. Oh, yeah, it was it was just such an interesting thing because compared to the massive and that's why I think at this point I was like if he wanted to reach out he would have it's just so fascinating isn't it? Because if it's meant to work out it shouldn't be that hard. You shouldn't have to make that much of an effort or think about a message that much exactly and you just proved that and some people say, well it's all about timing if you're both not in town of your travel pass. Lot, I do think timing has a lot to do with it. But if you really feel like you clicked with someone and you see that there's potential you make it work still. Yeah, you really do so, I don't know. I feel like I've heard for so long people instead. It'll just be easy. It'll click and I know some people have relationships they did have to work very hard to get to where they are. And I mean life is all very new still but I do feel like it was just it was easy. Yeah, there was nothing no games and it just kind of flowed and I think honestly it helped him and I met at a friend's birthday party. You have a lot of money. Yes. Highly of both of us to each other. So that was a good push as well. But you kind of persevered Against All Odds because one you met at a party to get your both out of town one after another for a very long time and three you kind of like gave up on him when he first said I'm going out of town. I'll call you when I get back. Yeah. Yep. I honestly cannot think I was going to hear from him when I got like a text to hang out. I was like wait who? Oh, yeah, like that guy isn't that nuts that when people say something we have a hard time trusting that they're actually going to follow up on what they're saying. That's that they're like, oh he's just saying that but that's not really going to happen. Well, you sound you sound very happy. I am very happy. I did you guys do the traditional like first date and all that or did you skip all that since you have mutual friends? We like went out and grab drinks on our first day and then our second day was actually like a mutual friend I think so it was kind of scattered in between like we would go on a day and then we kind of do stuff with friends. So it kind of built on that and I remember during your episode. We said something and I I remember me saying this like she'll be I think you just come off too. Cool. Like you are you go with the flow you're you know flexible to deal with and your birth Understanding and maybe that sometimes makes men think that they can say something and not keep their promise. Do you kind of feel like things aren't that way with with her boyfriend? I don't think things are really that way maybe just cuz I felt comfortable with him more quickly because we did have all these mutual friends that I didn't feel like I had to be so like lazy share about everything interesting So for anybody who was in the situation you were in a few months ago say with the mass situation and not hearing him from him again. What would you say to people who are in that same boat? I don't know. I would say not fixate on it so much that there are other people out there. It's just to keep putting yourself out there. But obviously if you feel like you have a really big connection with someone just Reach Out honestly, I think with the mat thing I felt connected to him, but I wasn't super disappointed. That I never heard from him either. It was we only had gone on a few dates. So I guess it's it is situational but they just don't give up. Yeah don't give up and all should know that you meet certain people for the right reasons and maybe they're not there to stay in your life.
00:10:05 - 00:15:01
But you have to go through these people to get to the right person. Exactly, Exactly. I dated a lot. What's your boyfriend's name? Andrew Andrew Well, we wish you and Andrew lots of Happiness lots of good time and lots of Just Good Vibes all around. Thanks so much for checking in with us. And it's like a very happy story it is I if you want to call me back a couple of weeks or a few months ago. I wouldn't have been the same. So right you never even if you just never know exactly you never know. Okay. Thanks so much. She'll be I know you're a busy with work and everything. So we'll check out. Later, awesome. Thank you guys so much. Have you ever done an Uber or Lyft and found yourself really jiving with a driver. That's exactly what happened to Chris on season 6 episode 5 called the unaffected ride. Chris told us the story of how he met his girlfriend when she was his Uber driver one fateful night. So are they still together? Let's call Chris. Hey Chris, how's it going? Chris off. So what's up? I don't want to know we haven't talked to you in awhile. And you know, we were so curious if you're still with your girlfriend tell us everything wage. She went to LA and I'm very soon. Oh, wow. We had a little bit of a relationship to be wage. You know what it was interesting to sort of going through that one of the big dog. Live up to expectation and so when I actually broke up with a wow, not good, but she went off in like we took reconnected made up to go to a party together and we decided you know, what which is still doing this and had so much fun with that party together that the next day. I was like know what telling me that you get back together. And so two days after breaking up with trying to go and tell what family size I'm actually not working up from the Cotton Patch it up and it's Faith look up stuff that we had worked out before and you know early gone to the trouble of what are we doing? What about this, you know had the what were the problem? It's become such a better relationship for you know, it's just a really good selection now, but what do you think it was after the break up? Like, what did you change about your communication Style? Mr. My communication style was like asking questions. Why are you upset about this thing? You know, is there something else going on behind the scenes in your head like something that I should be doing that maybe I'm not something that happened differently. I think another thing that I changed after that I had actually let myself kind of changes to someone else in a few wage clubbing and she and she would say, okay. Well I was and I realized I wasn't just backed it was very simple nothing but it's damaging to the relationship breakup with a chance to reset all of that and say why don't we look at each other like this is where you are. If you are right now. And I'm just going to work with that instead of try to mould you into something that I want you to be bringing other day. She was like Glad you are very very different because really difficult. I think that the listeners like, you know, you can Crunch drink someone but you're just going to cause a rebellion where you can call off or whatever. That's way more rewarding that sort of look at where they are. They are they say I'd like to what they are, you know, and it means that you know that there's no can be 100% for you what what you can actually off but then things that I would like her to be different but because she says use I get to actually instead book an event like a whole package and just enjoyed that is so well done. So well said yeah, you know with relationships in the beginning everyone's trying to please the other person because you're trying to be happy and make this whole thing work and then you reach a breaking point where you say am I also compromising my own happiness or my own identity. So that's when the walls come down. And you have to have these like very candid conversations about this is who you are. This is who I am. How can we meet each other's needs without compromising each other's happiness and identity and let's address all the problems on the table right now and that I think that's when you have a real Connection in a relationship. That's when the facade goes away.
00:15:01 - 00:20:05
That's when I say we're in this together and we're trying to create a life together and possibly a future together. How can we get there? So it sounds like you guys reach that breaking point in the walls had come down and the next step is you're moving to La for her. I mean she actually lived for me. So it's kind of on me was standing the appearance and the black one. And he's a little while and trying to down so, you know, she didn't got contacted by a dog. Company that wants to monitor the email and I said, why don't you go forward and so she's she's gone a little sooner than making marmalade to join a gym. I think that that signifies that point of seriousness and this is the reason to start has become down in order for them to work. So it's sort of weird at this very dramatic way of realizing that we were both kind of history in each other in a way by having all these expectations and not just accepting the person who they are, but I'm really glad that happens because it's let us print it and I feel like having that likes light is really great because it gives me the chance to just have a basically good record of not doing any of this sort of things that suck it up to expectation. And as a result, we have an argument about it and you know, it's all it's all fresh and it's a new start. So now. And then you've got a relationship. That sounds great. That sounds like a great way to create a new life together and start something fresh. Yeah. Thanks for sharing that. Updating us and set it off next Journey. Yeah. He's a really good. Will be months ago. I would have said I'm not so sure about this relationship. I think. Hundred the same city and that was another loading for me was that it is what you make it seem like your own heads things can affect taped. But for the whole duration of like the most magazines about to me was saying, you know, we would be right on the brink of breaking up to a new very become close in the mind to break off of the big difference to me compared to past relationships and it was something that made me really stick it out. So I appreciate that. She really put the work into like a particular that had never come back online as soon as I can tell that you would like want to break up when you got really bad. Well, you know, someone told me the easiest thing to do in a relationship is to break up. That is the possibly the most the easiest thing you could do the easiest decision and for both of you to have the courage and the motivation to not let that happen and get back together says a lot about your relationship already dead, but you know what? I'm not I'm not the one who kept it together. I was the one who was like six is really annoying and painful and she was the one that would say. Well not say that to her actions show but she's really serious about the most important and then kitchen again. Yeah, you need at least one person to do that. Yeah. I'm cool. Thanks Chris. Keep us updated on your new life in La we'll do another catch up session a few months and see how things are going and what other relationship advice we can take from you so much. Yeah, please do by Chris by it's time to take a quick break. So can you tell you about our current sponsor audible you get access to an unbeatable selection of audio books including bestsellers motivation Mysteries Thrillers Memoirs and more. We've really been enjoying our subscription to audible listening to our past guest. Dr. Alexandra Solomon's book off loving briefly and so many other books as well. We get to choose three titles every month one audiobook and to audible Originals. You can't hear anywhere else in the best part is that you can listen on any device anytime anywhere at home at the gym on your commute or just on the go right now for a limited time. You can get 3 months of audible for 695 a month. That's more than half off the regular price. Give yourself the gift of listening and while you're at it think about giving the gift of audible to someone on your list go to audible.com or text to the number 50050. Of today, that's eight u d i b l e l e or text to the number 500 500 to get started now wage the show a new dating term came out a few years ago called bread crumbing, which the Urban Dictionary defines as the act of sending out flirtatious but noncommittal text messages in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort.
00:20:05 - 00:25:08
Well on season 5 episode 10 Our Guest Pharaoh was victim to Chronic breadcrumbing from the guys. She was dating. Is she still being breadcrumbed Farrah. Please do tell hi Farrah. How's it going? We were wondering if you were breadcrumbing us for a second. I'm getting ready to go out. I'm just like doing my makeup and stuff and just not paying attention that you were calling by a Facebook. I'm so sorry about that. No worries. No worries. We've connected now. We're clear on your intentions and ready to go. We are so curious about what's been going on your life. Are you still in this bread crumbing situations, or have you got that under control? Yeah. By the way, the the episode three popular with my friends too. And there was no I feel you been there done that that was like it was popular General people really related to one of our most popular episodes cuz everyone's been breadcrumbed off all of the advice when I got and basically what happens have enough to the episode was I was dating someone for a few months and tendering wasn't really serious about, you know, saying like getting married and having kids anytime soon. So I woke up under God and then what ended up happening was did the same thing, you know, what all the feeding apps and so on and one day I realized I was getting myself and I was like, oh hell no, we're not doing this again. I decided to go through the app go through every single match that I had and the app. I was using was a tender anything. It was the league so you have you don't have as many matches dead. Every guy the same question, which is what are you looking to get out of, you know believe or or otherwise and the answers I got were super interesting. I think it's men often. Do you like the thing that they've never met you they're usually pretty honest. Not the one that I'm looking for something I was like great good not my journey, but like have fun and then I had guys who are very wishy-washy. Oh, yeah, you know and I'm thinking of the person I was like, you know people kind of tell who was being serious and who wasn't and I also sent Julie some screenshots of the guy that I've been off for a couple of where when I asked him. Hey, what are you doing? You know, what are you looking for? And he's like, what do you mean a guy like me I was like, okay touche declining. We called you out off of it. I like that. I was like ooh interesting. So I said look everybody's got their own journey. I just want to pick up any hitchhikers along the way and he's like, yeah, that's a good way of putting it and so he kind of went into Iraq looking for and how to cut his you know perspective on life not a beginner. And so thank you for your advice. It works. I need some how long have you guys been dating? This is so exciting. It's nice. Nice. Nice. Well, see, that's the thing. It's not so much about I think people, you know, sometimes they think how do I not get bread crumbed? It's not so much don't get bread crumb just weed out the people who will break from you but the whole point so you get them from the very beginning of why are people so scared of asking that question. What is it? You're hoping to get from this app, why are people supposed to asset? That should be the number one question you a specially when you don't even know them. It's not even personal. The funny thing is is I've been telling my girlfriend some of those have been doing it and some of them have it and the ones that haven't are still the ones that struggle. I'm like girls ladies. Yeah. So what all she signs have you gotten from him that he is not a breadcrumber. Well, I mean we communicate every day which is good. That's a big one big one right there off and connected. I I was traveling and then he has to travel for work. So then we just ended up texting a lot and just sharing more about our lives and building bad connection that way initially. So I mean, I guess it's kind of like when people write letters to each other it's the same thing before they they meet so it took us about two weeks and then I would do both in town then we finally month. They had a drink and probably within 5 minutes. It was holding hands and you know, like he was whispering to me. It's just really intermittent night to kind of know somebody before you meet them. Yep. So it was really great to just do that connection and just talk about, you know, things like your childhood and goals and all of that and I think people just shouldn't be afraid of bringing it up at the beginning because if a guy really is open to that he didn't want those things.
00:25:08 - 00:30:09
He's just going to you know pass and go on to something else and you're better off. Anyway, they'll find somebody want the same thing you want, you know, also while we're so happy for you. That's so exciting that that's such good news. That is such good news because it's it's a different perspective on dating instead of being in that rut that you were in why does everybody breaks are these like great guys who seem like great guys in the beginning they breadcrumb. Well, I think a lot of people are going through this because they don't ask the right questions in the beginning if you ask the right questions wrong and you establish your mind set your standards what you're open to then a wait sell all the people who are not like you said on the same Journey or look at the actions that I think like you said is like a game. If it's not lining up, it's like can you have a conversation if still not lining up? Is it really the right person and you know, some people some people would say well wouldn't someone just say off the right things in the beginning to get you the get you to like them or get you to sleep with them. The thing is like this is what we've learned from talking to all the singles who are dating in in this world today. It's so much work to do that. I know like if you so much easier just find someone else who's just looking to hook up right as opposed to trying to scam someone or like to manipulate so much. So they sleep with you like most people don't want to waste that time. Right? Cuz there's more than enough people that will just do one way more than enough you can tell too and someone's genuine versus just yeah stuff for the most part for the most part unless they're real good wage. What's up? I will say that there was some guys that were bred coming me that were so kind of hanging around going. Oh, let's be friends, but I'm still not sure I cut those people good job. I think is actually really key. Yes the bread, reset and just go forward and your head will be so much clearer. You'll be so much happier. Something really really. Mine is just like it's not about being mean or not being nice. You know, there's a saying you should put your oxygen mask on. First before helping others. Yes, I really believe. You know. for you and not Not like who cares I love it. That is like a 180 from when we talked to last. Yeah, I love it. And I think also it's like there is I've noticed this in my own life too. It's like even if you don't have someone new just removing people that aren't moving forward really makes that space for somebody new to come and like it seems like at the time you're like, well is this better than no one but it actually like not giving them does make that space. Oh, really? I think it's important to come in and you can't really do that. If you're just thinking about what ifs and maybe in or not but I feel completely cut certain people off block them on LinkedIn on Instagram Facebook and social media platforms deleted their phone numbers and give them a second thought and it's been great. Well, I need the point of life is because life is so short. You should surround yourself with people who are hell. Yes about you instead of maybe I don't know how I really feel about her. I don't know if I want to be friends with her. More data, why do why would you want people like that in your life? So yes cut out the people for Aunt maybe about your people that are consistent not just floating in and out when it's serves them. Yeah life just has been so great to catch up with you and hear this new version. I love this like new refresh new version of Sarah who is now no longer being breadcrumbed who's happy with a guy named. I mean, that's what we love to hear. It wasn't for you. Ladies and Rich. I don't think I would have gotten here as quickly. Thank you for the one of my heart for all of your kind off and all of your guidance and I love your show. I hope you can keep going up for for very very very long time. So I think it really does help a lot of people. So thank you both, Should I still here and I'm glad that tough love we gave you on their home with loved. Hopefully next time we catch up your boyfriend could get on the phone to ring. Awesome. Thanks so much girl, and last but not least. Do you guys remember my offer our guests? He was our co-host at the start of dateable and later moved to San Diego Michael who holds a master's in Clinical Psychology was always our voice of reason but he also had a quirky side which was summed up quite well in season one on an episode called the mushroom pick up. Yep is exactly as a sounds. He used a mushroom to pick up a woman at a conference. We watched catch up with Michael to see how he's enjoying the San Diego dating scene and more importantly if he's used any other fungi to pick up women.
00:30:09 - 00:35:03
Well, well stranger on the phone Michael Vargas, how are you? Sure. I can't believe how long have you been in San Diego now almost three years time just flies like I told you above. Hit a hundred episodes of data. Will we still get emails about? How's Michael Vargas doing? So we thought okay. It's time to check in because it's just been ages fourth line but to your in like a completely different environment and we want to hear all about what you've been up to but most importantly your love life Department what's been going on, San Diego actually some amazing people out here. So that's a great segue to how is your dating life? Okay, Friday, like it's been a bit of a roller coasters. It's team is really bad then nothing and then rediscovery and reconnecting go into all those buckets. So about shooting years ago. I meet a woman we met through mutual friends and we started dating but before we started dating I heard that she was going off. Divorce so I was like, okay and then I also heard that it was you know done with and everything like that. So I thought okay and we started dating and it was actually really fun game without dancing a lot which was nice you both were really like to dance and we had really good conversation. Like I saw like, I could really communicate with her and what happened was apparently her ex-wife reached out to me saying hey, we're still together. What are you doing? And I was like what weight her ex or ex wife her ex-wife. Yes for ex-wife lets me know that they're actually trying it out and I had no idea none of our mutual friends had any idea and then she just vanished her phone number was that like cut off she was all social media. She was just like gone. So I felt like what hurt the most was that I thought I could that we were communicating so clears. That's What Hurts the Most is like whoa like I was owed to see you and I was like I'm done I'm done I'm taking a step back off and so I didn't gain for about a year-and-a-half now just went in the past couple of months I started dating again good thank so that's out there yeah, I'm back in the early stages having fun. Yeah and and setting new standards for myself, okay, what are these new standards? I want to check everything very slow. So first I know that I want a monogamous relationship that's that's you know for me personally and I don't know how to how to say this but first like standard is like we both need to present a CD-ROM each other. Okay. Yes. It is about that but it's more about how did they handle we asking them right? That's what I'm really curious about both. For sure. I think that's just a healthy thing and to see dead. Okay, we're going to go in this kind of uncomfortable situation. But like we're also thinking about doing things but you know, so can we have a conversation about it? Yes, so that's one and then yeah and making sure that we're able to have a conversation with this means to us before we have sex. So those are two standards that I've kind of put off and then how are you meeting people? I never I don't know if people knew this about me, but I never had done like any online dating before not even like Tinder. No, I've never done any online gaming adverse, but I meet people by going out like the other day. This is a formal sorry. So the other day we went out to karaoke place called coyote and I like to dance and I was dancing and then I sat down and it's a gentleman's turn to sing karaoke and he has a phone in his hand, by the way. It's like an old phone. I want to open a page. I was just like a clamshell. Okay, and she she's looking around he has to sing and he just hands it to me without saying a word just gets me his phone and starts singing. So I just put on my lap and I think he was singing for someone on the phone and then across the room that's grown. I make eye contact and we start laughing because we're like this guy just gave me his phone but the funny molding and we got home. We kept flirting afterwards. You took the phone and I thought yeah, and she's so pretty she songs later music turns on where a lot of people start dancing and I just go up to her. I she's sitting down so I kind of like like house down below her a little bit.
00:35:03 - 00:40:03
Right? So like give her that space I guess and I asked would you like to dance and she goes? Yes, I'd love to you know, when you dance with that person that it just instantly, Yeah, that's what it was. I was like, whoa. Okay, great, even like had something like silly Parts where I was to like a Can-Can dance with her and she started cracking up and she said thank you so much for making me laugh so hard And then I'm starting to talk to her. And then she tells me all you know, I live in Arizona. Arizona is not where I live. She's she's here visiting. So that's some of like the weird stuff that happens at times but what a fun story people always complain. They don't meet anybody out anymore. It's because we don't take a moment to even connect with someone or even make eye contact with them. It just takes a bath simple smirk and a little you know, non-verbal understanding and then you can start talking to them and Jude in a way that also makes them feel very comfortable and safe right like wage. That's the biggest thing is like regardless of what you're trying to convey if you just help another person, especially a woman at a bar to feel safe. Yeah like and if it doesn't turn out to be anything great, but as long as long practice that that feeling of like, okay, they can feel safe around me like innocently because you are a sales person. You would never do anything, right? Yeah. Okay great. So you're getting yourself back out there by Thursday. Making yourself more available any interest in going on the apps at all really know. I just I just I'm more of like a bike rather be out in public. I don't think there's anything wrong. I don't think there's anything bad. I just don't think it's for me. Okay. I'm a very tactile experience. Like I don't like sitting on my laptop for longer than 45 min. It's like right it's just not connected to it. But I really like going out and just like being around good people right right and tell us about your podcast. Yeah. So this is this is a new age thing here is our topics are basically about organizations that they prevent social issues from occurring in the first place things, like domestic violence poverty homelessness, just woke up this morning at 6 a.m. I interviewed a gentleman who's in who's from Uganda about how they worked to create sustainable farming for these small families to help them out of power off. And hunger and also to be able to provide more food for the community and the way that they do it is fascinating because they work very hard to empower women to bring them to part of the page a part of the discussion is equal Partners. Like that's the first thing they focus on because they show how valuable women are and that's just like a topic that we have on the show off. So we've done did one recently with Doctor Emmett flew from the equality Institute and they worked to prevent violence against women all over the globe. Wow. Yeah, he knows about them. That's insane. And there's people doing these type of things all over the place. So the name of your podcast and where can people listen you can't find it on. I assumes facts defines Google Play Believe Center and add on our website by impact. Awesome. Love it, Michael so great catching up. You and so happy that you're back in the dating scene with a renewed perspective and higher standards. That's how you do it if you had to summarize the San Diego dating scene in one sentence or whatever. I need a little dating scene is a very relaxed style of dating that is also very open at times as well. Okay? And what is the main difference between San Diego's dating scene and San Francisco's dating scene. So I think San Francisco I think people go on just a lot more gates. Am I think that San Diego has more of a long-term relationship feel to it. Oh, really? Okay compared to San Francisco. It's a white box. That is so people are are more traditional. I just think that there's a lot of families out here. So it kind of like cuz here's like a great place to retire. Right? So families just lived in San Diego and I think they tend to have like brings that element to it. And which dating scene. Do you prefer eating out in San Diego? I think I liked the more like we're going to do this in San Francisco, but I like the long-term feel in San Diego. So if I what I mean by that like sheep more appointments compared to like a month ago in San Diego people maybe a little bit more flaky at times not by much for a little bit. So like there's two things kind of put the I would be my ideal.
00:40:03 - 00:44:10
Do you hear them? Same complaints in San Diego as we do in San Francisco like oh, yeah ghosted and bread crumbed and all those terms. And so I actually don't know what breadcrumb means thousand mean. Like they give me one weird little message that doesn't make sense that they still like little bit by little bit pretty much. I mean the string you along. Yes. Yes. Yes ya go Stark is definitely out here. I think it's like people complain about the same stuff out here. Okay. So for anyone who complains about the dating scene in their own City, I can pretty much guarantee you it's the same everywhere else. You're just going to have to make it work in your city. I like the grass is not greener on the other side. It's Greener where you rather? Yeah water. You're dating scene. People wage is your standards? Okay, that's how you do it. And also when people say, oh as soon as I moved to this new city dating was so much better. It's only because you're the fresh meat to begin. That's right. And everybody wants to catch the fresh fish everything's new and novel but then your newness wears off in like six months. That's exactly what I was going to say. I was like, oh I miss the first six months of being able to walk into anything sayings a new hear me to music Lakeline like everything down here of meeting friends. I'm impressed by everything show me cuz I don't know anything here some place. Talk to you know get to talk to you too. I'm glad we got to catch up for anyone who hasn't heard Michael's own episode on dateable. The mushroom said it's still raised in our top 10 facts really people really want to know about the mushroom tricks my goodness. So yeah, she is now living but we'll talk about that another day off. Okay when you have an update. Okay, cool. All right, thank you again for doing this call with us. I'm so happy. We got to catch up my pleasure and thanks for having brought back on was rushed to get to play again. We'll talk soon. I think I might go that's it for a catch-up sessions this week. Stay tuned for more next week, including our own updates. Also, we will be doing a Facebook live on Wednesday December 19th at 6:30 p.m. Pacific time. We will be bringing you some special guests who have a big announcement. They're making about the relationship tune in for that and is their job Particular guess you really would like to have an update about let us know happy holidays dateable family. And remember to stay dateable. This episode of datable is brought to you by 500 brunch 500 brunches connects like-minded people with similar interests to meet in real life over brunch. You answer a quick question are about your interest and how you spend your time. And then they'll match you in small groups of six to eight at a brunch spot in San Francisco get a free entry in 2 a brunch Now by signing up at five hundred branches, and using the code date able if you didn't know already, we have a revamped web site with articles videos and content all about modern dating. You can also find our premium y Series where we dissect analyze and offer solutions to some of the most common dating conundrums. We've had some great feedback about how actionable these episodes are. So check them out on our website or iTunes music also visit the site today to see the latest job. Coaching where we connect you with dateable approved experts to help with everything from dating profile reviews coaching and even Gathering real feedback about your dating style in a personalized and a half or double way to connect with us visit dateable podcast, You can also find us on Facebook Twitter and Instagram all under dateable podcast. Don't forget to subscribe and Auto download the podcast on iTunes or your favorite podcast player. So you never miss an episode.