Listen as we share our top Dateable episodes that have changed the way we date and approach finding love. We discuss our own personal journeys and how we’ve learned from our guest's experiences and the discussions we’ve had with them. Also check us out in the 'Top 15 Dating Audio Podcasts' Feedspot: https://blog.feedspot.com/dating_podcasts
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BONUS: Our Top Episodes That Have Changed How We Date And Find Love
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The dateable podcast features real stories from real people of how they make modern dating work or not each episode while not only offer you a new perspective on dating but will also change the way you The date. Dateable podcast is an insider's look into modern dating that the Huffington post calls one of the top ten podcast about love and sex. On each episode, we'll talk to real daters about. From sex parties to sex droughts, date fails a diaper fetishes and first moves to first loves. I'm your host Yue Xu, former dating coach turned dating sociologists. You also hear from my co host and producer Julie Krafchick as we explored this crazy dateable world. Hello everyone welcome to who ace special bonus episode of the dateable podcast where we talk about modern dating but with a very focused topic today which is drummer will are dueling Louis half ass Sherbro was really hoping that our live studio audience and give us more energy and noise but no they're quiet. Yes mojo my dog. He is busy licking. We we each had to choose three podcasts that changed the way we view dating and love and possibly changed the way we date yes so we'll go one by one okay. I'll start first okay. I will say one of the podcasts at really changed the way I view my pass. Dating was season eight episode to the Gold Standard Ooh so I'll say that again season eight episode to go back and revisit that so so in that episode we speak to Caroline about her gold standard and how it was so hard for her to even date today imprison day <hes> years after her gold standard had already married someone else and you and I Julian we shared our gold standard stories and I think what I really got out of that conversation was the gold standard is nothing but a memory yeah and it's an idealized memory of someone who really doesn't exist exists even if you re met your goal standard today that person's not the same person yet so you're just remembering them at a moment in time and they'll never live up to that gold standard. That's why nobody ever lives up to the gold standard because that's not a real person but I think that really helped for for me was to let go of some of the previous notions of maybe someone that got away or someone that I wish I give him more time to or made more effort with because there's no point in dwelling on the past we can only move forward with what our gold standard should be and that the person we we we ourselves should strive to be and that's person we ourselves should want to be with yet. That's interesting 'cause I was actually a task of picking to okay 'cause I. I think for myself too. I had a situation with my accent for years. I still thought like this was the person and like no one could stack up to him and again. It was like a memory because we were actually not even like in contact like we were like where we're at very loose contact. It was not we were not dating at the stage and I remember when we did actually meet up it like did not feel the same so it was like all that time I had been thinking about that. I think by hearing Caroline I definitely saw myself in the way that she was like so fixated on this person that just like couldn't be I mean it hurts situation. He literally was married so it was like he could not be no and it was holding her back from meeting someone else and what was our action item. I think it was like make a list is to end journal yeah the good and the bad because our memories true tend to hang onto the really good stuff about the gold standard but maybe you should remember some of the not so good thing just a remember like how real it was not the not so dreaming idealize yeah I know I mean for me personally. As soon as I kinda really came to terms that I was not going to be with my ex's when I met someone else yeah and I really believe like you if you're in that state where you believe that a person is that is the person for you is almost impossible to meet anyone. It's so unfair for anyone else now yet 'cause they're never going to live up to this part of your imagination. Totally Okay Yours okay <hes>. I guess I think the one that probably changed knee immediately. The most was a very recent episode. It was season eight episode fifteen going the distance with Sammy and David. You love that episode you L.. Sammy's also my co worker Sammy's house so we have talked a lot in person to but I think also because I was living this internally around that time like playing off the last comment like after I kind of let go of my axe is when when I met someone knew that I was the first time really fell for and that had hadn't had that feeling in a very long time and was from the U._K.. And while we started dating lost his visa situationally we essentially had to end our relationship. Gosh I know all about this one and we did try long distance for a little while.
00:05:06 - 00:10:30
We're still together while he was away over the holidays so I think when we were recording savvy David one of the reasons why actually approach savvy about doing this says because it shed to light when I was doing long distance how different it was like I just never thought about it before because I was never in that situation where you're so like reliant on your phone in like you're coordinating timezones when someone in the U.. K. and you're in San San Francisco is just like there's a lot of like dynamics that you just don't think about if you've yeah that's around. I think like initially to like it like feel like we were just friends that eventually like the conversations felt like had a flat at the beginning but then eventually we you got it to a place where we spiced it out so it kind of turned around so I just thought it was an interesting dynamic which is why I wanted you to episode but the reason why it actually changed the way I dated is as I mentioned once we found out he was actually leaving for good he he ended it and I think like for me. Sammy and David gave me a different perspective that like you can make things work like there's always a way to make things work of two people are in it and I mean their situation. They like navigated. He did through when Sammy was in London when David was in Portland and then when she moved to San Francisco and he was still in Portland and I think the big thing about them is like they kind of fall into it but they both were like in it like they still like really enjoy talking to each other and they were able to still form this relationship that was super solid even though they did not see each other on a day to day so I think what ended up happening in my own life is I kind of took that back to and we actually like my exit. I talked about like trying this long distance and I think like from Sami and David who kind of went in with no expectations. I kinda follow that same path like yeah. We know this is really hard like we know. This isn't like a situation where you can just come back. When you want to combat <hes> delicious see what happens both really enjoy each other and we don't want to necessarily give it out ultimately didn't make it but I think for me like it was more of the fact that I tried that I think is what changed my dynamic like in the past? I think I would have just been and like a lot of effort yeah like I don't know maybe it's just not meant to be but I think for me like after listening to this episode hearing their story and knowing like connections don't come around all the time and sometimes things aren't ideal state in one relationship because not one size fits all relationships. It's like two people making it work and I think ultimately yes. The distance was a challenge for me but I think the bigger challenge was that I was with someone. That didn't necessarily feel the same way. Long distance isn't for everyone so I don't want. It's like a wrong thing that he didn't WanNa continue a long distance relationship but like I really think of two people are in it no matter what you can make it work. I think what I really learned from that episode. Even if you are not in a long distance relationship the way third dynamic works is we're in this together and let's just do this whole thing by trial and error remember when we even asked him at the end of it. What was some advice you give to people and David was like very candidly? I shouldn't be the one giving advice because we're still trying figure this out but you just constantly course correct. I felt like they would try something and if it didn't work let's try something else and they were like working together to navigate their relationship which was really refreshing to hear because it's not like knee against view. It's not blaming. It's we're in this together as long as were both wanting to be with each other. We're GONNA figure shutout slowly and I think like for my own personal life like I don't again. I don't blame my acts like I think things changed for him in terms of where he originally was planning on moving back. Did it decided not to do that. I get long distance isn't ideal. It's a difficult situation so no blame there but I think at the end of the day after listening to Sammy and David unlike I need someone that is is equally in it. Yeah I think like when I realized he wasn't in it from the stance. I couldn't fight it anymore. I'm like I can't do long distance as one person so. It's like yeah you need. Those two people like you were just saying that are just like let's just figure shit <unk> out and make it work and I think like for me like I know even more than ever that I just need someone that is like so devoted that we're just gonNa make it work yeah and at least now you know you have it in you to do to want to do something like that something so crazy in something so logistically complicated but you were willing to do it and that's awesome to know that you have it in yeah and I think like it seeing how you can do it like I think for me. I'm like oh well. I family in Boston like my work is flexible flexible that I could go over there for three months. I don't know I just like I was finding solutions. Were in the past. I would not have found those yet. Oh you are opening doors in your own mind totally okay next one so my second one would be <hes> Marriage Wanna one which is a season finale for season seven episode twenty two and in this episode we spoke to Dr Alexandra Solomon who teaches one of the most popular classes at northwestern called Marriage Wanna one but she said it's a misnomer because it's she teaches people about love and dating and sex and the hookup culture basically how to be in a relationship with another human being and when I really took away from that conversation I mean everyone.
00:10:30 - 00:15:34
Everyone should listen to this episode. She has so many great things to say but what I really learned from this episode was her her talking about your knee jerk reaction. She gave her husband as an example where she's I've been with him for a long time and she's noticed that she has these knee jerk reactions to things he says and things that he does and before she reacts to them like she normally would. She takes a step back and reflects in a mirror sure and things about what are some ways that I can communicate my needs advocating for myself but also not placing blame and I really enjoyed her tactic there because we all have knee jerk reactions based on how we were brought up how we saw parents fight you know and how we deal with conflict but those are knee-jerk reactions that are innate in us and in a healthy relationship it's fine to have those knee jerk reactions but you have to one recognize them and to take a step back before you actually act upon them yeah. I think hers was really good so good because I personally feel like I've had the situation where you feel like you and your partner aren't seeing things I'd I and there's some conflict that you're like. Oh Oh baby there's someone better suited for me and she made the comment like conflicts inevitable thing. You're going to fight with everyone so you think that like there's this person that like magically everything's GonNa be okay with and it's like Conflict Blake Blake. It's two different people merging their lives right like so things that is super eight to you is into someone else exactly so I think like she helped me realize that lay for example like with my last partner like he was super logical and I'm like Berry Lake Passionate and emotional in the way I process things was different than his and it didn't mean like that lake. He wasn't feeling a certain way or whatnot but it's like I think just like realizing that you just have to. Work with another human yeah and was not brought up in the same way that you were bright and that's what it's all about relationships and getting mad and there's not going to ever be that perfect situation assigned to my friend may about <hes> something similar handler and she has this great frontier thing who is married to someone they've been married for a long time and they never fight so I was like is that a red flag that they never fight and may was like no no no listen their first three years of marriage was non stop fighting and they fought so much they literally have fought about everything now that they have no conflicts because they they hashed on in years but she said those first three years every time they have a fight they reflect on it it became I'm an experiment for them like they welcomed these conflicts and fights because they knew how to deal with them and they knew that after a fight they sit down and reflect on it so I was like okay so if a couple of fights that that's not necessarily a red flag in they don't fight that's not necessarily red flag day and I think like her points to around like I remember she had this example that lake her husband to like needed to take time out to like watch some sports games and like there was a voice in her head like why aren't you spending that time with me or whatever it may be or she didn't understand what that meant to him and then like it ended up being like Oh. This is important to him like this helps him recharge. You need to respect that even though it's not necessarily how I view things are what I think so I think it's what I got from. Her was just like taking it out of New England yeah holistically giving people space to beat them. Yeah Yeah Okay Yours. I feel like I just piggybacked off you watch it's fun. I was thinking about too. I think the one I would say is season six episode fifteen finale meeting your half or oh yeah. I knew you picked up with A._B.. Spencer great one yeah I mean this was kind of a cheat one because I actually read her book before we had her on the show and I've read a lot of dating books. I'd say ninety nine percent of that. We're pretty bad and this one always stuck out a really rape book because it was Super Authentic and her whole all concept is like the end of the day. You're you WANNA be happy right. In like being in a relationship is going to help you be happy. Like why do you have to wait to be happy if you're not in a relationship like be line to the happy and just do things that make you happy and then and if you're like vibrating that energy that's when you're in the best place to attract partner and I think like for me personally <hes> I definitely went through a period where I did a lot of cereal dating and I started giving really burnt it out and like honestly just wasn't showing up great on dates when you're in that vibe and I remember like taking like a good couple like like public six months and was not focused on dating and was like a launched my business business five hundred brunches and like was really a former sponsor.
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I just blew our cover. I swear new sponsors are not my business. anyways I eber like just being like really excited about that endeavor like just having really great friends and like just enjoying life and that is actually where I met. My significant acts was at a brunch when I was just like not really going looking for anyone whatsoever but I was just happy I was excited. I was friendly house my natural self in that's when leg you attract someone so she also mentioned like when you're so fixated on like going to every last singles event who's GonNa be there. It's just like you're not doing things. Fill your soul so it's like kind of when you try so hard. Sometimes it doesn't necessarily that you're going to get the results that you're looking for. It kind of reminds me of our episode with Heidi easer Y you're still seeing goal yeah why you can't find the one area totally butcher that title either kind of similar yeah but her her philosophy was we put so much pressure on this person. We haven't even Matt Young winning. The one is supposed to fulfill all of our needs so happy when we even have met this person so it's very similar to Amy Spencer's philosophy of like why put so much expectations around someone to complete. You're make you happy. They're not the ones making you whole you're the one in control of your life. Live the life you want to live and the right person will come along for the ride right. They're not we can't expect other people to make us happy Yup and I thinks her whole thing about just she had such a positive outlook she radiating positively. I think she is like a positively blog like stop but like I think like things like the way you say things like what you're putting out in the universe like she talked about like if you're like I'm still single. You're like fixated on being single's. That's like what you're putting out there when you're just like I want a relationship. It's like a very different like tone and vibe. I heard this really great piece of advice together day. This woman said Ed stop listening to yourself and start talking to your song and I think when we start listening to ourselves it's always a negative thoughts like the doubts the insecurities but if we start reversing that and just preemptively actively start talking to ourselves we do change our mindset. It does work totally and I think like it again. It's a balance like I think we talked about this on the episode like you're sitting home just like watching that flicks every Friday. It's GonNa be really hard to meet Yvonne but her point was like inevitably league. You'RE GONNA like get sick of that and want to get out in like be around people but I think there is a balance like again like if you you can't isolate yourself and totally go major introverted style also there's a lot of times we'll talk to people that are frustrated with dating like it's like that's all you're fixated on. I really dislike makes it really hard to lights. Be Happy and positive in just generally enjoy life but that's the thing like even the most introvert of introverts are not going to be happy sitting at home watching Netflix every day. It's the people who the the most unhappy people I see and Julie you know people like this to who go out solely for the purpose of meeting. Eating someone is ruined if they didn't meet that cute girl or that cute guy and then they can enjoy their time with their friends because they play so many expectations on this night of going out. That's why they become you know these Netflix people because they're like no other. What's the point of going out anyway? That's when you become unhappy because you're again. You're putting expectations on external factors that are out of your control to make him happy when you can control your own happiness cough Aram last episode it from me time for a quick break so we can talk about Lola which is a female founded company offering a line of organic cotton B._P._A.. Free TAMPONS PADS and liners you know products that you wouldn't mind putting your body and the good news is they also offer sex products to we'll make slowly different is that their products are formulated to deliver the sensation and reliability. You deserve without unnecessary. Irritating additives for example lowest condoms are made out of natural rubber latex individually tested for contraception and F._B._i.. Protection and Oh my God do they feel good and to get you even more in the mood.
00:20:05 - 00:25:15
The low of personal lubricant features a Mess Frey one click pump system with a water based formula made with Aloe Vera and it's completely hypoallergenic with low. Let you get get everything delivered to your door hassle free for dateable listeners. Only you get forty percents off your first month subscription to visit my Loa dot com and enter the code dateable when you subscribe again just visit my Lola Dot Com and and enter the Code D. A. T. e. when you subscribe to get forty percents off your first month now back to the show cough Iran last episode for me. I just want to say this is the third episode but I do have a runner up okay so let's say you're dead so the third episode that really changed the way I date actionable as of dating is season three going way back season three episode three dating on a whim because everything to do with me. I was set up on a blind date through Wim. The dating up don't know if they still exist but I met this very nice man tonight. Okay fine and I think what happened was. I walked walked away from that date thinking I fucking killed it. I'm so good at data on the masturbating. I'm dating expert. I just I need I have a p._H._d.. Dating and he did like posting interviewing he was basically like she was fake and I did not come off genuine or authentic. I'll do you call me out. Hard core was like she did the date talk. She put on a performance. She was there to entertain but I didn't know any layers about her until until I told her to like show me some vulnerability show me other layers if you are so yes on one hand episode was about me and I learned a lot but on the other hand is I think about how I carry myself throughout the days and like how I can be more authentic connections you mean with like non-romantic partners even with my friends or even like with a stranger. How can I go straight to a deeper connection as opposed to just surface level and part of that is opening myself up to vulnerability to to allow allow other people to come into my world and what that means? Is You know I'm like independent only child who never ask for help before but I think after this episode I was like what if I'm I start asking for help more start showing showing not a weakness like the things that I lack I can find and other people and I can ask for that and other people and that brings them closer to me that means more to me than any like great first date you go on and you're like oh it was it was great. We had a good conversation. He was a great conversationalist and well. You know we got home and then you're like. I don't remember anything else about it. I don't I don't know who this person I went on a date with so that date. Talk really translates into my everyday life and I you think about all the time now. I actually that episode even though it happened to you I think they're honestly that actually is one of the biggest problems with modern dating. Is that a lot of times people. Don't get through that date. Talk like we heard that on the exit interview that we did with yes thin. It was like people didn't like if you only have one date one drank like you don't have that much time right so it's like it's you're already at that disadvantage but if you use that time to just have surface level conversations you walk away in your dislike. I don't really know anything about that person like yeah they could be. Anyone could interchange with any sort of person so I think the best dates personally that I've been on is when we don't have any day talk in which is like you walk in and like this is like some something like an old friend that you're jiving with and talking like how you would to a friend like either joking around or getting Tillich some deep good stuff even on date one or two. I think the goal is to not be ambivalent after a date and I think that with socks I much rather walk away from date being like I don't ever want to see this person again then. I'm not sure I mean it was fine. I'll see them again. I guess but it's like not a strong feeling or a strong poll yet so I think think in order to have those strong feelings that you have to have a deeper connection okay your third. Oh I have such a three way tie right now. It's high comb on Julie just going to not go to the sappy stuff but I'm just the go-to okay if I'm GONNA pick one. I think I'M GONNA go with this one of the surprising one for me but it really stuck out to me. It's season eight. <hes> see if I can guess Asu Party. No just kidding well. Sex Party was life changing for both of us that was not in the way you probably definitely not okay. I'M GONNA go with season eight episode. Twelve Vagina tangles okay I kind of okay I was debating on that one too okay so this is an unexpected one for me for sure we had Aaron from the wise woman podcasts fantastic and we'll actually probably be re airing her episode shortly as well that we were on.
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wiggly fun like we met her at South by southwest when we mind and she was like very spiritual kind of like we're gonNA doing mindful feeding and we both kind of thought she was going to give us like the very basics of like meditation hang yeah and I think honestly like she kind of blew me away like she was so surprising so surprising like we're talking about shock Ras and like all the stuff that I like knew about but didn't really know about but the one thing kind of the title of it I really said that to me is just fine. He's basically one of the shock res- is in your Vagina area and like she basically cut a skull that out like for women. There's that feeling and you just don't really know how to explain it or not. Ought let your either just like WanNa jump that guy's bones or you don't and for years I could never explain what this was and we have to so many women. They're just like all just like there was no chemistry right. There was no vibe and like why okay can I be next to one guy and I can't keep my hands off and then there's another that I'm like please. Don't touch me like is that even though it's relatively same attractiveness physically. There's just like something going on. I mean she. It's a very strong opinion dance. She's like if you're not feeling it leave. Get out you know. It's like your body's telling you what you need to know and I think for me. I've had this happen so many times and I'm so mixed because like we've talked about this S._o.. On like the gold standard the episode that like should you wait for that spark or could someone grow on you right but I know for me. I've had so many instances where I've tried to let people grow on me yeah in for whatever reason it just like I don't feel vagina tingle and it doesn't seem to like can't force it force vagina like the time it's grown for me when I wasn't thinking about it and then one day it did for a friend that turned into more but like I recently was dating someone when that was like a perfectly Nice Guy Great on paper we got along but I just did not have the vagina tangles and forever. I could not understand why I just like wasn't feeling that and I thought maybe it's because I'm not like over someone else or like. Maybe there's Seles going on. That's like after it's like no you just like some people. You just don't have it. It's not like anything on them like there's probably another girl that has crazy Regina tingles for them. It should be with her. Why is a guy you don't want to be someone that doesn't and how the vice versa girl to guy? It's not the multi goal. I think it goes into the bigger discussion of US needing to listen to our bodies more reveal emotions like there's sometimes I'm happy and a ghost to my neck and then sometimes I'm happy ghost might my toes head to toe and <hes> Julian. I went to this conference a few weeks ago and the founder of bugs was there and he talked about goosebumps moment. Oh Man Yeah he's talking about this is these are the moments you know you're onto something or like. This is a passion and those are like physical feelings that we need to pay more attention to because that's your body being like this is beyond just emotional. This is like physical you you can feel it now. That's true and I've also been in situations to when I am so crazy but it's one but there's something in my gut. That doesn't feel right. I think you also need to listen to those two like why am I feeling so nervous. Why am I doc feeling uncomfortable? Like why do I feel like a heaviness in my hips or something you know. They something. That's like pulling you down. We feel we hear that alright. I like I remember even like you made a comment to be recently like when I entered a relationship you're like you seem lighter yeah because it's like you're trying to make something work. That's not working and it's like it's just like there's so much going on in your body. Yeah okay so we're GONNA cheat a little bit very quickly. We're going to get that one runner Europe because it was hard to issues that last one but my runner-up was season seven episode Ford Diaper Fetish do weights here how this applies to your day-today life. Do you have a secret taper finish. It's okay to try to find my diaper Fetish but Quick Synopsis We did an episode about diaper fetish where our guest was approached by someone to try out this fetish with him and she wasn't on board for so then we had a listener reach out to us and say I have a diaper fetish. I WanNa tell you our story and I think why this episode really stuck with me one beyond the fact that I've never met anybody with a diaper fetish who spoke so candidly about his experience but to Mike he'd like normalize the entire thing for me the whole time I was like oh he could be talking about him liking snickers and it'd be the exact same feeling so.
00:30:10 - 00:35:02
I think what it really brought out for me. was I need to be the more open minded and dating especially if you are going to be in a long term relationship with someone you never know what could unfold throughout the years you know how can you really they might not even know what's them yeah so we just have to be more versatile and more open minded ended in how we relate to other people and less judgmental because you you even know what you're going to be like in ten years and what your fetishes could be that is a really good point like I was talking to a friend of mine from New York when she was visiting we're talking about poly-amorous Murray and she was at kind of asking my take on it and I was like currently like I feel like I've been dating for a while looking for that one person but come twenty years into marriage when I've been with that person who knows like I don't know so what like how I feel because I haven't been in that situation so I agree with you. It's like you just don't know what's going to happen and any both of us. We actually love US hilarious conversation three days and I sharing do you and I tell people was yeah so you and I were tally after we touch David. We actually don't know what David Look like because it was through skype but we both were like hot yeah. We're like he met a really good. Looking guy that was super sweet. He's seem super nice yeah super loyal to like in very commitment focus everything driven dishes career like everything kind of like seemed to line up a we met someone and everything was great except the one thing that they want us to throw on a diaper like hell honestly I think are few years. I've been like dealbreaker but now dislike. Why not that sounds really comfortable? I mean if worst contaminating the relationship this a lot worse. Hey thongs or a diaper diaper. I choose the doctor anyways. I think the whole fetish thing was super interesting. We had Samantha Diaper Fetish part one riches the season six episode eleven had Samantha come on Samantha had never really been exposed to something like this and also the way it was presented to her was kind of meet as a joke too so anno- lick fall to her all but I think like for both of us us also like it was kind of like a foreign concept at that time so I think having someone normalize it and also just like the more you become aware of all the staffing if something does pop into your relationship at a later time you're more equipped to handle it for sure. If it's something you've never thought about or heard about before Yep. Okay my runner up yeah you can only choose one. Hey so my runner up one. I think is our last launer season finale of season eight fs with Ryan van end user so it was just I mean honestly like he basically tells us about his quest for love we talk about the stories crazy story of his how he like basically like fell head over heels like love at first sight and and pretty much things kind of blew up almost as quickly as they started and we really just got real tam about like kind of what was holding him back in the past from finding love and being like his full self in relationships in the walls built up up he was just so freaky authentic and like vulnerable on this podcast. It was amazing but I think like for me why it stood out is like it's a reminder of like kind of why we why are we doing this. I know we go through all the bullshit it comes with data. The light fine love because it really is like the most magical thing that's how he described. It and it's like the most amazing feeling like I know for me like my happiest times have been like when I'm like head over heels in love and like the part that sucks sucks is the heartbreak that comes with it however like for me going through like very very excruciating heartbreak with kind of where I came out the strongest like I feel like for years I always kind of like had someone floating. I never really got in touch with myself and then having a heartbreak that like really devastated me really did make me like it changed me as a person so I think like in a ditch. Show me the capacity that I had to love like I think if you can if you feel deep deep heartbreak okay. Can you know you really love someone like his episode was just like kind of a reminder that like there's ups and downs as you a love story in the roller coaster allergy. We're GonNa have to find something else for constantly on the rollercoaster in our love lives and dating lives and all of that but the end of the day it's all worth it right and that's why we do what we do and it's so great to hear that from Ryan because again in that episode we talked about your perception. People have of view and you be for him.
00:35:02 - 00:38:00
People think he's like that's happy. Go Lucky Guy who can get any girl he wants. He's so social also T._v.. Personality what a life he has but deep down he's still going through these issues of one. He's not ever going to give up on love but why was he having hard time break breaking through these relationships so I think he's going through a metamorphosis himself which is just amazing fascinating to see yeah. I think honestly that's been one of the most fascinating things on this podcast cast is like everyone has their shed like. There's something going on with everyone like no one has things perfect in like if you are kind of in the mindset like Oh that person so lucky dating must be so easy for them. No you just don't know right so idea. Yeah I think we are I. I know it's so cliche we say the thousand has like everyone is on their own journey and I think what we I love hearing. People's journeys like those episodes like are always so interesting to me and guys don't forget you're on this journey forever. There is absolutely no destination just on this infinite journey and you can't like you're not getting off this journey anytime soon so don't ever we can look at someone be like Oh. They made it. Nobody's actually making this is like if you're in love or you get married. There's not like the end point not at all and like we were saying earlier with like the marriage one. Oh One and some of them is like you might go through rough patches or diaper. Finish things change like it'd be exposed to do things that like it's kind of how do you lake overcome enroll with it. Yeah and Y'all we want to hear from you. What are some episodes that you've heard on dateable that changes the way you view love and dating and sex or change the way you actually date and do relationships and you know connections and all that stuff because these are the episodes of really affected us? I can name like ten at least ten other ones but we want to know what episodes have you've really been drawn to. That'd be great to hear from you so email us. Let let us know we know Jason. It was definitely the exit interview for him. He's dated differently now. We're going to check in with him but that was a reality. Check for share and this is exactly why we do the dateable podcast one we love hearing all the stories for entertainment payment but to we want to know how we can all change the dating scene for all of us to date better today smarter today happier right. We're in this right like Amy Censor said be lined to the happy Yulon to the hat date to and make yourself unhappy. What's the point okay wrapping this up stage want to continue the conversation? I tag us in any post with Hashtag. Stay dateable then head on over to our website dateable PODCASTS DOT com there you'll find all the episodes as well as articles videos and our coaching services with vetted industry experts. You can also find our premium. Y series where we dissect analyze an offer solutions to some of the most common dating conundrums.